Prenatal
Had my first prenatal visit today, which was not actually an official prenatal visit but rather a "pregnancy confirmation" visit. To make sure I'm not just really mistaken, I guess. I've only gained 4 pounds, which I found surprising. I feel like I've gained about 10.
I was happy to get a midwife instead of a physician, but I think she was a certified nurse-midwife. At any rate, while she was very thorough and competent and all that, I felt like there was a bit of a power struggle there. I felt like she was trying to out-expert me, when I wasn't even aware we were racing, if you know what I mean. It was a really different vibe there than at the place I went for my last pregnancy, which I felt was very empowering. (If you think that's too flaky a thing to say, then you haven't been in an office where they treat you like egg-laying chicken #568d.)
Anyway, she tried to convince me to switch to skim milk, and finally said we'd watch my weight to see how it went (alarm #1--not encouraging me to trust my own body, and also focusing on food restriction). Then, knowing full well that I'm a psychologist, she gave me a list of serotonin -increasing items--I wondered if it was going to be a list of some kind of herbs or supplements or something--that consisted of things like "sunshine, sex, chocolate, exercise." Um, I already know quite well how to suck eggs here, lady. I only mentioned that I get prenatal depression to give you an accurate clinical picture, not because I had absolutely no idea that laughter and prayer improve one's mood. And then there was the thing about fish and the thing about the due date...sigh. Basically, she was correcting me about things that were ambiguous and ignoring things she didn't understand, giving me the impression of someone who really wanted to make sure I believed her version of my pregnancy by barraging me with facts, or at least factoids.
Anyway, I got a much more interventionist kind of feeling than from my previous place, where I think I had a plain ol' midwife, not a nurse-midwife. There's a difference.
I'm also 41 this time instead of 38, which will probably trigger all kinds of anxieties in health care practitioners. ("Liability!" "Gestational diabetes!" "Down's Syndrome!")
I wonder who these Amish women around here use? Probably other Amish women who are midwives. Huh.
Anyway, I'm trying to get in touch with the local Bradley instructors. Maybe they'll have some ideas.
I was happy to get a midwife instead of a physician, but I think she was a certified nurse-midwife. At any rate, while she was very thorough and competent and all that, I felt like there was a bit of a power struggle there. I felt like she was trying to out-expert me, when I wasn't even aware we were racing, if you know what I mean. It was a really different vibe there than at the place I went for my last pregnancy, which I felt was very empowering. (If you think that's too flaky a thing to say, then you haven't been in an office where they treat you like egg-laying chicken #568d.)
Anyway, she tried to convince me to switch to skim milk, and finally said we'd watch my weight to see how it went (alarm #1--not encouraging me to trust my own body, and also focusing on food restriction). Then, knowing full well that I'm a psychologist, she gave me a list of serotonin -increasing items--I wondered if it was going to be a list of some kind of herbs or supplements or something--that consisted of things like "sunshine, sex, chocolate, exercise." Um, I already know quite well how to suck eggs here, lady. I only mentioned that I get prenatal depression to give you an accurate clinical picture, not because I had absolutely no idea that laughter and prayer improve one's mood. And then there was the thing about fish and the thing about the due date...sigh. Basically, she was correcting me about things that were ambiguous and ignoring things she didn't understand, giving me the impression of someone who really wanted to make sure I believed her version of my pregnancy by barraging me with facts, or at least factoids.
Anyway, I got a much more interventionist kind of feeling than from my previous place, where I think I had a plain ol' midwife, not a nurse-midwife. There's a difference.
I'm also 41 this time instead of 38, which will probably trigger all kinds of anxieties in health care practitioners. ("Liability!" "Gestational diabetes!" "Down's Syndrome!")
I wonder who these Amish women around here use? Probably other Amish women who are midwives. Huh.
Anyway, I'm trying to get in touch with the local Bradley instructors. Maybe they'll have some ideas.
2 Comments:
Good luck! That really sucks about your midwife - hopefully you can find someone that makes you comfortable. I found the midwives I had were not very comforting at all and they were all very obnoxious (one in UK and 2 here). So I found an OB/GYN that I loved and respected my decisions. Of course I was having a repeat c-section (after a totally botched emergency c-section in the UK) so that may have had something to do with it!
I also had gestational diabetes my last time around. Not fun, but you get to see lots of pictures of the baby at the end!
Good luck!
By Mimi, at 10:29 AM
I had such a great experience last time with the midwives (as you say, that whole respect thing) at our last practice in Michigan, so this was a bit of cold water.
When I'm in labor, I don't want to have someone around who makes me uncomfortable. I'll go off to a cave, I'll really do it! (Or around here, maybe a barn.)
By liz, at 10:43 AM
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