32 Weeks

Yikes! Getting close. The average non-induced pregnancy is 41-1/7 weeks long (though in this country often induced at 38 weeks, when baby may or may not be ripe, just like a green peach ready for shipping! This at least partly explains the exceptionally low birth rate of American babies.)

(BTW, someone else's child up there.)

At any rate, the exit date is getting close. I really don't feel like I will have a baby, I feel like I have a baby now. S/he's just not outside yet. The baby already does social-interactive things like waking up around 9pm in time for "stories" (as Dad and I read to each other at bedtime), and jumping around every day when Dad gets home after work and starts talking. I can feel the little wiggly body moving around in its packing fluid when I squish my belly.

I think I would feel deeply insulted and misunderstood (on top of grief-stricken, of course) if I were one of those women who lose their babies to stillbirth at this point, and have insensitive people say things to the effect that it's not really that great a loss since the baby hadn't been born yet.

We attended our final Bradley class last night. I can't believe it's been three months already! That first trimester dragged on for about nine months, but these last three months flew by like just a few weeks. I am so glad we did that class. I can't imagine giving birth without being prepared like this. It'd be like being tossed into the ocean without knowing how to swim.

Last night we saw some amazing clips from a video showing results of a study of unmedicated babies (that is, the mother was not medicated during the birth so the baby is also unimpaired) who were not separated from the mother after birth. These babies were compared to babies from medicated births, and those who were separated from the mother after birth for the routine procedures (weighing, measuring, washing, and what-have-you.) Your basic 4-cell, 2-condition study.

Of course you can guess that the unmedicated, unseparated babies did a lot better than the others. In fact, the video shows the typical result in that condition, which was the little nekkid critter crawling up Mum's abdomen of its own accord, seeking and finding the breast, and latching on to it properly. Looked very much like a newborn kitten or puppy. (The cover of the video shows some stills, if you enlarge it.) It was pretty impressive!

I keep feeling incredulous at how huuuge I've become. The other day we were examining how the area that used to be my belly-button is now about 4" in diameter (you can tell the edge from the circular pattern of little hairs.) I wonder how it will look after? I have neither a personal trainer nor a plastic surgeon, so I'm guessing it won't be like Br1tney. (The joke in Bradley class: "I wonder if she's already scheduled her next C-section yet?") I probably weigh about 160lbs at this point, though I don't have a scale at home. Also, my nails recently grew to about half an inch (not exaggerating!) before I finally broke down and cut them.

I can no longer see what's happening when I have to pee into the little cup at my prenatal appointments. I mainly have to go by the sounds, and guesswork. Shaving my legs or clipping my toenails is also exceedingly awkward, though I still do it. (For now!)

I've finally had decent energy the past few weeks, thank goodness. Most days I don't have to nap, and I wake up at 6 or 6:30 on my own. How long this will last, I don't know, but I'm trying to take advantage of it while I can to get my data done.

The only really unpleasant thing at this point is the back/hips thing (my sacroiliac thing). I really can't sit anywhere comfortably, and if I do sit anyway, it becomes excruciating after ten minutes or so. (That pinchy, sharp, shooting kind of pain that starts in my back and extends down my legs.) This means that driving or sitting in the car is pretty awful, as is sitting at the computer (I've had to write this in several goes, and I'm constantly wriggling and standing up and kneeling and trying to find a tolerable position as I write), or on the couch, or even on the floor.

The only comfortable position I can find these days is lying down, and since there's that big ball in front, I basically have to lie on my side. (Lying on my back is bad, as The Ball closes off a necessary artery if one does that.) It always hurts to some extent, no matter what I'm doing. It's just that some things make it hurt worse, or a lot worse, depending.

However, I know it's temporary. Hope I can hack it for a few months!